WEAK in SGN ....BUSY....CAI LUONG.... PUKING ....scheduling BS ....recovering ...and a 'Gayer' Monkey

Where am I?......HomeAway in Sai Gon in September 2022 .... at least I think so ....

 

How did I get here?   I can't remember... 

 

4:00

I wake up..... I'm coughing like crazy

then I sleep until 6:30

I almost puke when trying to brush my teeth and my right hand is shaking.. almost like an uncontrollable twitching of the fingers which makes typing difficult....

I manage to drag myself to the Circle K ..... oooh they have 3 bottles of wine.....

st00pid western girls in the hotel elevator....

Eda emails ...about the Camper Van..

... I panic and I almost despair.... then I talk to her...and I feel better.

8:00

ready to deal with things again...

9:00

I went to the bank machine and then bought phone minutes.....

10:15

try to nap a bit

drop off the laundry in the hotel around the corner

shower

A trip to Coopmart for new clothes

I talk to receptionist Toi....Is there a Cai Luong show tonight?....NO...neither is there water puppet or Lune Productions in Saigon.....SAD

Lisa & Tina are in Sai Gon as well....and they are so bad at communicating...they are in their hotel (fancy Vien Dong Hotel for Westerners, because it has BREAKFAST included; perfect for chubby Lesbians ;-) ....I am hungry....but they are already having a snack..... self-centered.... ICH KY !

Toi says that the Cai Luong Theater has their annual judged auditions....and that they are FREE to the public..... but he doesn't know what day and what time....

I walk over to the theater

and talk to the security guard..... 19:00/19:30 tonight, but not tomorrow.....

I put pressure on Lisa...you better hurry if you want to see me tonight....

17:15

She calls.... meet at 18:00...I say OK.....but then she texts at 17:20.... we are already in the lobby.....GRRRRR ....stupid !!

I run over there..... Tina wants to go to PizzaHut.....I say NO WAY..... I show them the two streets where Westerners eat... we eventually find a place that serves Pizza... 2 different kinds of Veggie pizza....but not the one they want..... and Tina wants Pizza tonight.....st00pid... I want Wiener Schnitzel but one has to make compromises when meeting friends.... they both make sour faces at the WRONG kind of vegetarian pizza......  I say "This is too complicated.....you eat somewhere and I eat somewhere else" and turn on my heels and go eat some seafood curry with rice somewhere......

Go home rest for 20 mins and .... 

19:00 

I walk to the Nha Hat Cai Luong.....

as advertised..... it is FREE

Of course, I have no idea what they are saying......it's in Vietnamese !

But the OVER-acting kind of makes it obvious what is happening ;-) 

The usual TRAGIC Vietnamese story......

Father doesn't like daughter's boyfriend......

 

 

and father kills boyfriend of daughter .....

Then, out of remorse and fate, father turns into a giant rock.....

....but later, he is de-rocked.... with a chance to remedy his evil deeds

I leave after 30 minutes.....the music brings tears to my eyes....or maybe that's just my general state of mind right now....

The sign says:  Fried noodles with Beef....

I send Phap a picture and a lovey message and get an almost instant reply... !

20:00 

I'm back in my hotel room.... I did cry too much during Cai Luong ....

I watch some Netflix

  

21:15

doze

22:15

HUNGRY....

I head out to Bui Vien but instantly regret it....this street has turned into a MADHOUSE....Millions of 18 year olds with gorgeous bodies in outrageous clouds and clothes ... but somehow I see NO sign that there is "anybody home" in their heads....

The owner woman doesn't want me to sit by the street and points me to a desk in the back....bitch....I guess I'm not pretty enough anymore.... I order sausages and fries

The food takes FOREVER ...

 

and I have to watch the stupidity on Bui Vien unfold.... I go check for my food with angry gestures at the brown-haired manager.

 

I am appeased when the tranny delivers the food....for some reason I like him/her....

.. and WOLF down the whole portion of food....Even during the eating, I think that this might be a mistake....

23:00

Full of sausage and fries and back in the room.... 

sleep

5:00

oh oh....this belly ache better not be what I fear it might be .....stupid me.... it would complicate or even rule out flying to Tuy Hoa to meet meeting Phap there tomorrow

PUKE

8:00-20:00 (Yes....that is 12 hours) 

 

 

sleep

I told him already last morning "maybe I can't come to Tuy Hoa" .....and the pictures show why ....

sick in bed...

He replies "I will come visit you"

WHERE TF is he?

Are you in Tuy Hoa or SGN? I ask him.

He says "I'm leaving for SGN on Monday and will meet me on Friday in SGN"

sleep

 

Phap is so confused.....he's returning to Bien Hoa tomorrow.....good thing I am sick and I'm not flying to Tuy Hoa tomorrow.....IDIOT..... good thing I asked..... otherwise I would have flown to TH tomorrow to meet him there.

 

I start drinking again...

22:30

try to sleep....

3:00

Awake again....too much exhausted napping yesterday.... even though I should know better, I start sipping some wine.....

 

4:00

Talk to Eda...

A message to Phap .....enough chasing him and enough second guessing ..... "Have a safe journey. I will be in Saigon all week".

I'm drinking too much again.....what am I going to do in Saigon all week?

7:00

I've applied for my Cambodian Visa

8:00

I've booked the flight to Phnom Penh

Now which Hotel to stay in?.......

As usual after one of my puking episodes.....my pee is dark orange ..... (something is bleeding inside me) and my brain is SLOW....but then I'm used to it.....and it will clear up tomorrow....

8:45

I'm all mopey and depressed on my balcony.....when I realize that the tent and drumming is a DRAGON dance..... I quickly shave and shower in the hope of running over there and taking some pictures....

alas when I'm clean the dance is over.....but it served a purpose to get my butt into motion....

9:00

I try to extend the room, and do pick up my laundry, buy more wine......

I need to get stuff done today

I ask in the pharmacy for reading glasses....they don't have any...and don't know where to buy any..... walk my ass off through 3 CirkleKs to find wine......LUCKILY, I run into the sunglass vendor.....I ask him.... co cai kinh doc sach khong?.....and he does have some..... I'll be able to fill out the stupid forms on the flight to Cambodia....

10:00

I can have the room until Thursday unless something changes....

11:00

I scream at my computer again..... FUCKING Mastercard doesn't let me pay for my VietVisa application.   They want to send me a confirmation code to my cell phone....NOT to my email..... so the payment fails....

WHY do SO MANY of my problems come from CANADA?

 

nap

12:30 huh?

I get some toilet paper from Tam....and she gives me an almost complete pack of tissue ;-)

I pay Long until Thursday, when I will be homeless.....

but then I find a suite a bit removed but beautiful 

15:45

The monkey keeps sending brief Zalo messages.....  I ask him to call Hong Hai to tell them I'm not coming..... he replies that he's out of phone minutes .....  "What good is a personal assistant who can't make phone calls?  Khong chuyen nghiep"

Then I try to call him and my phone tells me I'm dialing an incorrect number .... WTF? is he doing?

Google keeps sending me his location....he's on the move.....and it tells me that his phone battery is at 51%.......What is this world coming to ?

16:00

tired with teary eyes.....

Monkey calls back

We fix the phone issue....

16:30

Monkey tells me the newest gossip..... and I'm part of it...... the fishwives (including Nhat) have started to gossip.....and it's spreading rapidly..... the rumour is that the Monkey is St00pid and Gay....

WHAT?

Just because he hangs out with me?

And then it hits me.....the police records show us both registered in that house...... because that's what Quang required for the Monkey to live in my house when I'm gone.... and it leaked and the single minded turds couldn't get enough of it......

Can't wait to get back to that cesspool of stupidity ;-)

16:45

A quick run to The Store....spend 500k on two bottles of wine and a carton of Marlboro..... Tam is still working cleaning rooms....she is tired.....  I decide to bring out my own garbage....

17:30

I feel hungry.....to Sushi Sun....

18:30

Phap replies.....today he is sick .....

I wish him the speediest recovery 

and then "I want to feed you grapes to make you feel better ;-)"

and he just sends a sleeping rabbit in bed with hearts..... I miss him so much.....

Let's do another set of calisthenics.....gotta look buff on Friday ;-)

Maybe it's all gonna turn out alright
I suspect that it will not, but I have to believe that it will

21:00

try to sleep after finishing the 3rd bottle.....

NOPE

 

22:00

try again after opening the 4th bottle.....

off the rails....VH-TH .... PHAP LOVE....QE2 DIES....TH-SGN

 2:00 (AM ;-) in Vinh Hoa

I wake up and I keep sniffing my armpits....do I really stink that badly?....Granted, the bed sheet is not that clean anymore....but I just can't be smelling THIS BAD...... 

It takes me a while to realize that I'm smelling Nhat frying his fish cakes next door.....

I get up anyway....stuff to do....

4:00

More drinking....more thinking.....if he asks for money today I will dump him for good.....3 years and he still does not live with me....instead he 'borrowed' $10,000 and he has a wife and kid.....and NO change in sight.

time to pass out?

sleep

5:00

wake up horny and a completely different outlook on life.....yes, he probably is just a whore....but should I care?..... have some fun and send him packing......plenty of whores around.....  

(4 years later, in 2026 when I finally publish this, I regret the above paragraph SO MUCH.  On a positive note:  I don't edit my past....but I have changed....and so has he )

nap

7:30

Hang out with Lisa and Tina......Lisa is a typical horse.....just like Grandma...Big head, small thoughts.... ouch ....

8:00

Start packing and taking another fistful of bum pills...

nap...feeling crappy

The Monkey shows up at 11:15....I have ZERO energy

11:30

My is right on time.... The Monkey is going to accompany me in the taxi to Tuy Hoa and ride back with My after dropping me off.

I buy a case of wine and a carton of Marlboro in Song Cau......not sure what I'm going to do with a case of wine in one day....but who cares

Monkey asks....."go eat?".....at first I balk but then I realize it's better than sitting alone in a hotel room waiting for Phap

And it's YUMMY ....Monkey eats two portions and says "Ego sum pauper".... (from a 2026 perspective:  The kid has a severe problem with being unselfish and greedy)

13:40

They leave..... I'm slightly resigned but manage to fall asleep in Hong Hai Hotel in Tuy Hoa

15:00

No Phap .... DMM

15:15

A message...."Phap will go travel late"......NO indication what time that will be....

I write back...."Always the same ....bla bla bla ....Han HATES waiting.....what time arrive in Tuy Hoa?"

No answer, of course ......

16:00

I smoke on the balcony....and then someone hugs me from behind.... HAPPINESS !

One hour of "SO HAPPY" hugging and kissing....

17:15

I'm going to buy some milk for the fresh baby.....he forgets to mention that he will bring it home....

17:45

Before HAPPY and now going back to black.....

19:00

he's back...... 

His wife is still in the hospital after a Cesarean.....that's where he usually sleeps....and picks rice at his parents during the day.....no idea what he told the wife and the parents.....

drink, talk, sleep

I finally get off at 3 am....

sleep and cuddle and feel SO GOOD

7:30

he leaves but my body is still tingling......

7:45

No answer from Eda or Chantal....

8:00

I read the news....Holy Shit....QE2 died.......end of an era and a bout of panic that I will get an email that Grandma died today....

8:30

Talk to Eda .....nice

8:45

Another explosive release.... with porn but I keep thinking about Phap....

9:00

call Chantal

10:00

I might as well have Bun Cha for breakfast..... YUMMY....and only 30k (CAD$ 1.66) LOL....

12:00

From the series The Good Doctor: 

You can't outrun your pain, Dr. Lim....If you keep trying, it's going to kill you.....

 I wonder why that sentence rings a very loud bell....

13:00

I've showered, packed, and ordered my new GICs......

14:15

Phap paid the bill again, I think....I pay the late-check out charge.... and take a taxi to Tuy Hoa airport

How about that for a smoking area in the secure zone ? LOL

St00pid shuttle bus drives out there lets the people out of the bus to walk to the plane ...then someone realizes that the plane is still being refueled and everyone has to go back in the bus.....I'm watching this from the terminal, waiting for the bus to come back and pick up the second half of the passengers.....

 

But finally they get it sorted out.... 

 

18:45

Finally (!!!) I arrive in Sai Gon in HomeAway... 

I'm stumbling into the lobby......  Nasty traffic....and I realize what an arse I was expecting Phap to come to the hotel after work through this kind of traffic..... (4 years later he does it all the time !)

A realization....Phap is not the problem (OK, kind of yes, a little, he still has to learn)....but I am the main problem ... I'm not dealing with my health or my issues and putting all the blame for my misery somewhere else.....

Maybe the Monkey was right AGAIN.....Yesterday maybe was that day...the day your life will really change....

22:00

trying to sleep....

Swimming with a dolphin ... and Winnetou......7,8,9.... Phap BABY.... Going CRAZY.... Dragon Dance

 4:00

At first slightly depressed/worried....but no panic attack today.... seeing his face last night prevented that....

4:30

After a coffee and a glass of wine...... let's get stuff done....

5:00

already tipsy again.....

nap

6:30

8:00

I waddle over to Lisa's......her Hanoi cousins and Quang are there.....awkward...

A lovey message to Phap.... seeing your face is like watching the sunrise in VH..... no lam toi hanh phuc.

9:45

nap

10:30

Of course Tuan doesn't show up for Papaya Pancakes...... bla bla bla.....

11:00

buy 8 bottles of wine....I assure her that she can buy more....if I have to leave I will buy it and store it in the house....

I start cooking chua ngot....

Monkey calls and says his brother will be here at noon.....

12:20

Of course NOT.....

13:15

Monkey AND Brother......

Bobby texts...: Are you going to send Monkey to the bank today?

HELL NO

I make a Papaya Pancake for Toan and he doesn't appreciate it...

15:30

Monkey & Brother leave....I'm not too sad to see Toan leave .... he funny when he is drunk but he's not growing up....

 

17:30... a lovey message from Phap....OMFG.....

an early night

sleep

2:30

AWAKE....might as well have coffee.....I can hear and smell Nhat making his fish cakes....

and then it hits....

it's SEPTEMBER !....with all the issues that it will bring.... and I so CRAVE to hug him....

"Who am I if not seen through your eyes"

5:00

nap naked after having a whole bottle for breakfast....

6:00

start cleaning the house

8:00

Chat with Lisa and Tina......Hoa's daughter is cleaning for them now....

8:45

The Monkey calls......"Do you have enough food for 2 days?".....He's going to be gone for 2 days to Binh Dinh... and he will bring me another ripe DuDu .....I remember to take his helmet from my scooter....

9:15

DRUNK.....need another nap....

10:15

JUST woke up when the Monkey shows up.....OMFG.....Tuan was right.....we ARE so alike and get along SO well....

11:05

Monkey leaves...

12:00

my water pump doesn't work....I whine at Lisa's  ....when we see Thanh on my property.... 

Together we fix the pump (mostly him, of course...).....then he points out the dolphin in the bay..... I call Lisa;  she changes into her bikini and we go swimming with the dolphin.....but it's not normal...probably sick....just keeps pacing back and forth.....closer and closer to the shore....

Thanh searches the internet...... 2 days ago there was a dead dolphin in Tuy Hoa....Yesterday a dead dolphin in Bai Xep..... I'm afraid we'll have one tomorrow..... 

The Vietnamese don't eat dolphins and whales.... the Buddhist monks give them a burial on the beach with all the music and flags they can muster...... NEVER stop learning !

What a gorgeous man !  MAYBE I picked the wrong cousin....

naps

19:15

Phap was on Zalo 15 minutes ago....but hasn't sent any reply to my LOVING message of last night....all his messages have disappeared....   FUCK YOU !

19:30

The Monkey calls from WAY NORTH of Quy Nhon.... almost in Sa Huyn....it took him 5 hours to take the bus there..... and he has intestinal pain on the right side.....better not be the appendix..... talking to him reminds me what Phap should be like..... getting ready to dump him (again ;-).

20:15

I'm sick of it..... Unless he comes up with something SPECIAL, he will be history....he might not even get a dumping notice...I might just ignore him.....   I am ANGRY again....

21:00

4 bottles of wine today.....time to sleep....and time to change my life....

21:30

pass out

22:30

a message ....sleep well Han......GRRRR

sleep

4:00

LMFAO..... today is Vietnam's National Independence day......and the bird looks like a stork bringing a baby....

putter putter putter

An email..... I can register to get my Booster Shot in Canada....

6:00

Thanh walks to the beach and checks whether I'm there..... go swimming he motions.....OK ;-)

Shit, what a hot little body.... we pick up plastic bags from the ocean floor...

6:45

Chat with Lisa.....

7:15.....

buy some more wine....only one bottle....I tell them to buy MORE.... now I actually have to go to Song Cau to get wine and Marlboro there.....

12:00

back at home.......3 hairdressers are CLOSED today.....stupid holiday

Just when I'm starting to feel down .....the Monkey calls and cheers me up...... he'll be back tomorrow afternoon....

nap

14:34

Lisa calls......let's go......

16:00

The CUTIE with his future wife shows up and keeps looking into my eyes...OH NO.....Another one stepped into the honey trap and he will marry the brown-haired girl with the bad lipstick next month........and he doesn't stop looking in my eyes and smiling......SHIT....SO SAD.....people are so stupid and I have to be OUT OUT OUT to show them the alternative.....

back at home

a beer with Tu

nap

The Monkey calls.....I tell him about the cutie and the pregnant wife....and Monkey says...he is saying Help Help Help......how can a 17 year old be so smart?......Maybe I helped a little....but then he says "you only have two hands"...... I am LUCKY to have Monkey in my life....

21:00

Nothing from Phap.....he's going to be blocked soon......

drunk pass out

4:00

coffee and get drunk

nap

6:15

get up.....

hai tre trau come to ask for cigarettes.... mua di.....khong co tien....ok..... mot buoi sang tot lanh.... WTF...everything in Vietnamese.....?!?!

7:00

breakfast with Lisa & family

7:15

Eda does not answer.....

I can hear Denise but she can't hear me .....

she sends an email that Hans is in pain....maybe talk tomorrow, she says

10:00

The Monkey calls.....can you pick me up at the Big Mango Tree?......I ride out...and pick him up....

haircut....but neither of us has enough money..... doesn't matter

hang out at my house

13:00

Anh Chin calls.....Co Tam is at his restaurant.....

and there is 7 and 8 and 9..... I drink beer with them and the Monkey.....Co 7 looks fiendishly smart.....like Binh....and she is the one who asks whether I have met my lover again recently .....OH SHIT they ALL know..... and they don't care a bit.....as long as my lover produces a baby.....

I drive to the haircut place.....it's not Phuong or 7Huong but Thuong..... and drop the Monkey off at home and pet my very pregnant dog.....

17:00

back at home....with an appointment to drink more beer with husband of Co Bay at 19:00....Lisa is supposed to be back from Song Cau at 19:00 too...she wants to meet Tam.

nap

18:30

wake up, brush teeth, and stumble over there

7 is still asleep.....but I drink 3 bottles of beer, have dinner with (my?) family.....and hopefully make a good impression on all the aunts and uncles.....

20:45

they want me to drink more but I say "SAY va se VE" and thank them for their hospitality and the food....and I stumble home....

sleep

4:00

Call Hans, call Eda

ANGRY at Phap....he will never learn....

Call Eda again....I'm about to dump him.....

Monkey comes and goes and comes again

sept 6

We hear drums.... lion dance....I walk barefoot without a shirt to find the drummers.....walk by Binh and say "Chao buoi toi" in a sarcastic voice.....I ask the villagers ....bum bum bum o dau....I find them when they are just leaving.....Like the Pied Piper of Hamelin....I am followed home by an entourage of children dressed in Monkey and Pig costumes...... and then there is another Lion Dance.....

<pics>

20:00

I text him....if you want to meet me, tell me soon, otherwise I will di choi o Sai Gon.

an almost instant reply..... I will come on Thursday, do you have time?"

"I always have time for Phap"

"Will you stay at Hong Hai Hotel?"

Why don't you want to come to VH?"   

"don't have a scooter".....

I video call him......

We will meet on Thursday 2 pm in room 406....

sleep

Rain in the morning.....

drunk...talking to Lisa.....

I confirmed the hotel in Saigon from Friday to Monday

Booked the flight from Tuy Hoa for Friday....  maybe meet Phuong but mostly I am hungry and I don't want to live close to Phap if he doesn't have time for me.....

11;45

drunk.....crying with a sad song..."love is a crazy game".... need to sleep.....

nap

13:15

<TIME WARP> 

and as of August 2026 (4 years later), I don't remember what else happened on that day 4 long years ago ....the kid is almost 4 years old now; the wife is long gone; and Phap will come visit me tonight....... A lesson learned....don't fret too much about current problems;  Everything is always changing....

The LONG way HOME.... FINALLY..... YVR-NRT-SGN ....

5:00

Where am I? ..... In Vancouver.....but today is a SPECIAL day !!! 

The alarm is set for 7:00....but I'm having a panic attack again ....feeling overwhelmed and incapable of doing this today....

the feeling passes after a few minutes.... and then I remember all the people and friends over there I will finally see again.... and that makes any ordeal worth it..... and flying business class should not really be such an ordeal ;-) .... but having been in Vancouver for 7 months now .....I expect everything to be an ordeal......and THAT is why I NEED to get out of here !

5:45

It's already light outside..... I've worked through the first few basic items on today's agenda.....baby steps....

6:15

Tipsy already..... and I should get ready soon...maybe it's the booze...or Van Morrison singing Sweet Thing..... but maybe its because I'M GOING HOME and I'm already imagining meeting all the village people again !!!!

7:00

Pressure relief with porn.....I better stop drinking now.... I got stuff to do today and I don't want them to refuse me a boarding pass because I'm drunk at the check-in counter !

7:30

Yes....I'm tipsy and TIRED...... nap for an hour?  ...... no...I want to sleep on the plane !

I make the mistake of scanning Canadian news.... and there is the word "Airport Chaos"..... I knew that I shouldn't read the Canadian news :-(

doze for an hour

8:30

I'm freezing even thought I've turned the heat up to 24.5..... that's OK....starting tomorrow, I will no longer be cold !

9:05

FINALLY......shaved and showered.....and the bathroom utensils are in the suitcase.....

9:15

I put on my pants.....they are tight....did I get fat?.....and that rough spot on my lip better not be a cold sore...... PLEASE NOT NOW, LOL....

9:30

Almost time....

9:45

A smoke on the balcony..... I start giggling.....tears are streaming down my face .... and I keep mumbling out loud.... "I'm going HOME".

10:05

The taxi arrives

I doze through the first bit of the drive

At Granville and 52nd, I ask the driver to pull into the side street.....gotta PEE

11:00

Checking in is pleasant....they look for a while whether I REALLY don't need a PCR test...then I get all window seats all the way to Saigon..... AND she puts that little sticker on my boarding pass that allows me to use the FastTrack.....no need to line up for hours to get through security.....but there doesn't seem to be a line-up at this hour today anyway

11:30

Then I feel hungry......Let's try a Japa-Dog...

.. it's yummy but I can't finish it..... too many calories

12:00

Finally I find a place that serves booze outside the security zone..... I order a glass of white wine and I get this:

that is IT ????

R U kidding me ? 

Eda texts and I call her..... I'm going to miss her SO MUCH !

12:15

An email with my gas bill..... $322 for the last month.......it was only $180 last month !.....FUCK, it's COLD in this country....  good thing I turned the heat OFF this morning.

12:45

I'm back at Urban Crave for another glass of overpriced wine .....still one hour until boarding time

I call Chantal.....she's getting more mellow these days.... I'm happy for her that age DID come accompanied by wisdom !

13:15

Time for one last cigarette .....and then time to head for security and the plane !

It is still a strange experience to walk LEFT upon entering the plane instead of the usual RIGHT...

 

Bye Bye, grey Mordor  !!!!

I finish this post in 2026, and I have not been to Mordor in over 4 years ! 

YES....this chair turns into a FLAT BED ;-)

love those electronic window shades on the Dreamliner ;-)

YES, that is a BIG TV ;-)

Not sure what that is....buy I eat it anyway

a

Still not sure what that is .....

I chose Japanese breakfast instead of Western ....

 I finally arrive at Narita after 10 hours.....my first trip....SMOKING BOOTH ;-)

I receive an email  ....my next flight is delayed by HOURS.....instead of 17:30, the new take of time is 21:30

FUCK......I'm exhausting myself.....there is nothing to do at Narita....

Even though I am flying business class, I end up sitting on the floor outside the smoking lounge closest to my gate with a can of BEER.   Can you spell Charles Bukowski ?

The second flight is no much more fun than the first one (even though it is only 6 hours long)....(even in business class) .... I'm clammy.....

YET AGAIN, they don't have the Fish Meal.....(what is wrong with JAL?)....and the steak they serve instead is tougher than shoe-leather (same as on the 1st flight)... at least the stewardess with that amazing smile keeps me moistened with Sauvignon Blanc.

1:30 am....... FINALLY touch down in SaiGon

Immigration is fast... (not many flights arrive at this hour)

...that e-Visa worked....the suitcase arrives....I walk outside into the balmy WARMTH. (a feeling I have rarely had in the last 7 months)

OMFG, there are a lot of people waiting outside at 2am

The taxi driver is a rip-off artist, but I don't even care anymore at 2 am....but I take a stand and give him the finger and shout at him when he tells me that he has to show my passport to the parking attendant and pay 150k for me.....FUCKER...

2:30

We reach the hotel....

Finally some good news....the bus boy has to wake the receptionist.... and instead of changing rooms tomorrow, he already booked me into the Business Suite...

Living/Work Room

Bedroom

Not so deluxe after all...no beer in the fridge, no balcony furniture.....but I love the fact that I can see the park ;-)

Time to sleep and fight jet-lag....

Dire Days.....May 22..... Chantal visits....tables gone ... exhausted but still happy

A no-school night in Vancouver:

2:00

Eda went to bed..... I still can't believe she came here even though her period is troubling her so much.... I am so grateful to have such a good friend...... she is keeping me SANE ....

2:30

I'm still SO WIRED because of the Phap video call and the great time with Eda...this is what LIFE is about.....but it's time to sleep !

7:45

OMG.....now this is a REAL HANGOVER.....

coffee doesn't help.....wine doesn't help......OUCH.....

8:15

Eda is awake..... 

10:30

back home from the bottle depot....I panicked when I realized that I forgot my mask and 2 homeless guys were scanning the incoming electro trash....

Oh....when I flicked all the fuses last night, I also killed the pilot lights of the two fireplaces..... something else to fix :-(

10:45

I go out to check the solar wattage being produced.....ZERO..... back inside....oh...I missed to pop one of the fuses back in.... the one for the outside outlet..... now it works....22.8W....

11:00

I email Chantal......

pressure relief...MUCH needed !

11:15

Chantal replied.... she'll be here in about 1 hour.....

11:45

of course, now is when I feel like a nap :-(

Instead I go to work in the front yard.....

12:15

Chantal has arrived ....

we chat, we eat, then she wants to disrupt my rest day by using Facebook Marketplace to get rid of the ugly gold & glass coffee tables....

Finally, I agree, clean the tables and Chantal takes pictures....

Some man with an Arab or Persian name replies and wants to take them both.... he says it will take 45 minutes.....

40 minutes later....Chantal missed a phone call... we go check...and a woman (wearing a hijab) and an Arab looking man are loading the tables into a minivan...... I thank them for taking the tables...they are very polite and respectful....and I have a vision:

A room with carpets on the walls...those golden tables in the middle with a teapot and lots of small glasses on top....and people sitting on pillows around the table drinking tea .....

These tables have finally found their true home ;-)

Then Chantal wants to head back to the big creek..... first we try to snap the padlock.... only to discover it wasn't even locked..... and it's gorgeous down there by the creek..... I'm grateful to Chantal to have pushed me to go there.....

16:45

Chantal leaves....taking the lard pots and the succulent plant and the Cuisinart coffee maker with her.....

17:15

I email Carlos ... and he replies promptly.... I KNEW that Carlos is one of the most sincere and least phony people I know !

17:45

I feel I NEED a nap....

nap

18;45

I'm killing the hunger feeling with toast, turkey breast, pickles, Kampot pepper... not too bad... should finish that turkey breast soon...

19:20

After a lot of FRUSTRATING button pushing, I've finally managed to turn the pilot light in the downstairs fireplace on again.....the controls are NOT intuitive !!!!

19:45

I carry the orange-flowering tree to the front...... I envision it growing next to the stairs in the front.....much prettier than it growing behind the creek in the back..... I've dug the hole already.... it will be planted just before it starts raining .....

20:00

I start stripping Grandma's bed.....sheets into garbage bags and the down pillows will follow when I have room in the garbage can.....

20:15

a bit of calisthenics....more organizing/cleaning/trashing stuff

An idea....Why put goose-down duvets in the trash....might as well bury the feathers in the garden !

21:00

I email Phap..... "I am still heart-happy because I saw you"

21:15

I'm tired....No Netflix for 2 days.....this is The Life ;-)

21:45

Can't sleep....eat some vanilla yogurt with mandarins..... MISSING Phap....just hoping he didn't meet anyone to fall in love with.....

22:30

checking out male Asian escorts on LeoList....yeah....I know..... but when Chantal asked me whether I thought I felt that I had to be monogamous, I instantly reply: ....Hell NO....I'm not the one who lied, cheated, made a baby, and fucking got MARRIED !  

23:30

try to read (Erich Maria Remarque) and sleep

but NO....I'm moving furniture

....because I'm encouraged by Chantal's action today....the TV stands and crap will go for free and I will have the TV with porn in front of my bed (blush ;-)

Dire Days: May 5 -6 ....Corona Tsunami .....FRUSTRATION.... Bedroom move .... No Eda?!? ....SADNESS

5:45 in Vancouver....

I got my $484 tax refund ;-)

7:15

tipsy and tired....

7:45

can't sleep

an email to Phap  "sleep well my love"

I also reply to Avocado Alex.....

8:30

Sangak with cheese/capers and the other half with a slice of salami.....I'm going to get fat....

The weather forecast for the next 2 weeks......2 weeks of RAIN.....  SIGH :-(

nap

10:00

I stagger into the kitchen...check the Viet phone....nothing....2 seconds later the Canadian phone chimes....a Phap reply...."You too. Have a nice day love. I want to see Han always smiling"...

I MISS him SO MUCH...  he's only 29....and he is such an amazing person.....she doesn't deserve him....

More weeding out junk....it hurts... but it has to go.....George's cell phone goes into the electronics recycling....almost exactly 8 years after he died.....

screw showering for the day

A trip down Westview: A carton of cigs and Sushi/caviar and a snapper fillet.....to be fried and eaten with curry and rice.....

11:15

Back home....eat some sushi.....and I change the lockscreen on my Canadian phone.... 

but then I change it back again.....looking at him every time I use my phone would break my heart while I'm away from him.....

11:30

When I cut the snapper fillet into 3 pieces to be frozen separately, I get the urge...... cast iron pan, olive oil, Kampot pepper, salt, lime, a touch of wasabi.....on Multigrain toast......it's divine....I really know how to cook !

Next time I'll add a hint of garlic and a hint of chili...

12:00

Interest rates are still going up.....the 2-year GIC that I bought now pays 3.61% instead of 3.53% 5 days ago

12:30

I use a thick wooden stick to convert the two UGLY but heavy carriage light stands into a BARBELL.... Amazingly, the wooden stick fits perfectly...and the combined weight of those metal stands is perfect as a barbell.....Happy calisthenics ;-)

13:00

Eda emails....."looks like you're going to miss me this weekend".....oh no...not another one..... 

OMG....the Covid wave is coming....Conrad.....Mika...Chantal....Randy ....maybe Eda next....

and it's POURING outside and it's 5 Celsius at 1pm.....what a hell hole !!!

WHY THE FUCK am I HERE and NOT in Viet Nam?

14:15

The Inglewood psychiatrist calls..... I thank him for turning Grandma into a human being.... he is GOOD....

I use that black insulating sticky tape to insulate the front door and the upstairs fireplace.....that should put and end to or at least reduce that annoying cold draft in the living room.....and should reduce my heating bill.....

15:00

Another one of those phone calls....."you have an Amazon order of $1500....it may be fraudulent"....this time I talk to the guy on the other end.....and I ask him "How much are they paying you to annoy people and to rip people off?"

15:15

I liberated the 3rd charge controller from the van ...

15:30

read more....

Throw more junk in the garbage bin....about 100 cassette tapes in racks....

I talk to Andrea for over one hour....

17:30

Still no Amazon delivery....

read a bit....

18:15

still no Amazon....

18:30

Talk to Chantal....I can right away tell by her voice that she is SICK..... sore throat, fever, chills, etc etc

Talk to Eda....she's still fine.....

19:00

My Amazon order to be delivered by Purolator is officially designated LATE on the website.....what else is new?   Go Canada Go !

nap

21:00

NOW they are saying sorry..... the package is not coming today after all .... FUCK Purolator

I start cooking rice....down to 2 in the freezer....might as well cook now while I'm awake and have nothing else urgent to do....

22:00

I didn't send a "have a good day" email to Phap.....I feel bad....but I have to tone it down.... otherwise I miss him too much......tomorrow morning maybe.....

22:45

OMG....I find pictures from 25 years ago and some even older.....

0:30

awake and hungry.....sangak with cherry jam / hummus.... Must NOT buy the Safeway generic hummus again....NOT good....

1:30

time to get more zzzs

5:45

coffee.... I can feel the result of my calisthenics in my arms and shoulders !

6:15

A lovey email to Phap....

7:00

read and pressure relief....

nap

8:30

I wake up and remember the last few words uttered by me in my dream "It's a betrayal"

8:45

I've put the hand painted 4387 sign in the Van's rear window.....Yes, it looks trashy, but at least the delivery people will be able to see a number now.

Sangak with salami & capers.... not ideal but I was hungry and I can feel muscle ache !

9:15

I've wet-mopped the linoleum part of the floor of the prospective new bedroom, Eda's bathroom, as well as mine upstairs....... productive !

10:00

I've shaved !    I'm a bit down because I haven't heard from Phap (Friday evening over there) but I can't let it make me dysfunctional .... I have got stuff to do ....not only to see him again, but to steer my life in the direction it should be going..... 

11:00

Back in the house....and CRANKY.......absolute traffic gridlock on Westview below the highway.....God only knows why....people did U-ys to get out of it and so did I .....Safeway.....cranky people and NO Covid test kits.... I can't help it and ask the pharmacist "Does ANYTHING work in this country?"

Also at Safeway: Tons of veggie burgers, but all the beef burgers are trash and come with mashed potato and veggies.....FUCK

AND ....nothing from Phap.....doubts are rising again ...... 

11:15

I'm putting the $3.49 Stoufer's meatloaf in the microwave......

Actually not as bad as I had feared...A LOT of Kampot pepper gives it some taste....at least I got some red meat into my body !

11:45

I check on Google Maps....Westview below the highway is still in gridlock...... What a FUCKED-UP city !

12:00

I've had to interrupt mowing the front meadow because my digestive system decided to transport the 'meatloaf' to the waste-end ASAP..... 

At least the front meadow is done for a while...and I cleared some of that wild growth with the lawnmower ;-)

13:15

I've moved all the furniture and my new bedroom is complete...

....including remote-controlled reading light ;-)

I read and sleep very well in my new bedroom...until at 13:45 the doorbell wakes me.....Purolator delivered !

I put 2 dandelion solar lights in the back yard.... and another 2....

14:30

The traffic jam on lower Westview has cleared.....might as well dump all the stuff in the car at the Salvation Army now!

And I drop off the Sony laptop at the repair shop... not sure it'll be worth fixing it...but it'll be a good spare...

15:00

Back at home.....

read a bit.....toast with salami mandarins & cheese....

16:00

Nothing from Phap..6:00 in Vietnam....the thoughts are getting darker....

I try disconnecting the stupid yard flood lights that Albert installed..... no motion sensor, only a daylight sensor....and no OFF button.....I turn the rear one towards the wall and leave the front one for now.....I want to disconnect them, but don't want to be electrocuted in my inebriated state....

16:45

Eda calls....she has no Covid tests...her co-worker offered twice to bring her some but didn't follow through....what is WRONG with people in this country?!?....so she can't test herself tomorrow morning and won't come....

17:00

7am in Vietnam....nothing..... the last email from him was yesterday at 10:00 my time

Precooked noodles with chorizo, capers, and olives...YUM

18:00

nap

19:30

20:00

The rear light is facing the wall and now the twilight sensor makes it flash.....go down and turn it sideways....that seems to fix the flashing.....

18:15

I start laundry, refill all the empty boxes with books and reload the car....

21:00

It's dark enough now.....the solar lights go on.... not exactly what I was hoping for....not exactly in good taste....the colours are a bit too gaudy ....

I try to read and sleep....but NO..... I'm hungry !

22:30

half a ciabatta bun with salami, cheese/caviar, hummus (in three different sections)

23:00

try to sleep again.....