Saigon.... Chuc mung sinh nhat Han & Phap ..NASTY NU.... Phap cancels ... Bun Cha 145 ... exhausted by the DRAMA

In Saigon..... it's my BIRTHDAY

5:30

too early..... but if I stay in bed I'll just get horny....and I'm saving it for later ;-)

6:30

A Zalo message from Joanna ....for the new year lots of love and friendship...... OMG, she is SO SWEET ...

of course NOTHING from anyone else .... either they forgot or the time difference is too much of a cerebral challenge....

7:15

Time to do sink laundry.... too many smelly clothes and not enough clean ones....

7:30

reading the news......OMFG it's going to be BAD......Saigon factories are laying of 1000s ALREADY because the West no longer consumes......

7:45

I call Eda......  she's FRUSTRATED at work..... and forgot my birthday (I don't remind her) .... no worries

8:00

A text from Lisa......she REMEMBERED my birthday !

8:15

3rd load of sink laundry..... I have to do things productive instead of just drinking....

nap

10:30 OMG.....and HUNGRY

time to hit a CircleK....the other direction now....

3 bottles of wine, and phone money ...Some Grandma can't wait and is trying to push herself in while I'm not done yet.... I wave my hand.....she gives me the evil staring eye out of her maskless face..... I stare back and hiss 'bat lich su'...... I'm glad when I'm back in my hotel room.....that street has no trees and is busy as hell....NO fun...

Of course, I forgot coffee again :-(

11:15

Wash the pants and shirt I just wore..... the stuff I washed this morning is already dry on the balcony ;-)

12:00

Worn out....drunk? ....or just worn out by traveling?

It occurs to me.....the three birthday wishes I got came from the people I least expected it from  ....Tam Phu Diem, Joanna, Lisa.....

12:30

shave shower....

13:00

exhausted....and it starts to rain.....so much for going to buy coffee now....

14:00

Denise finally remembered my birthday......

Direct sun on my balcony.... it is unbearably HOT....

14:30

I've applied for my next Cambodian visa....

I email Iwona.... she's not answering my phone calls....but I do want to do some planning for my time in Cambodia....

15:00

Sluggishness hits me again.....I send a message to Phap....I'm in Room 502 and will leave the door open starting at 18:00

"I will come soon. I miss my love"

That gives me energy..... go buy some coffee & a carton of smokes....at first I actually thought about taking a taxi to the market to buy flowers..... stupid.....the air outside is much nicer than the air in the apartment or the heat on the balcony.....

16:15

I should stop drinking....the egg sandwich came out already again..... less and less time until I meet my lover..... I can't believe it was only 2 weeks ago.....it seems so much longer.....

another set of laundry.....

17:30

try to have a nap to bridge the waiting time.....

20:20

He calls from the reception

PURE BLISS  "I so happy", he keeps saying

we sleep with our hands entwined...

and at MIDNIGHT ....it is HIS birthday !

15:45

he leaves

18:00

I walk to Sushi Sun.....  AND....

18:01

I get 3 emails from The Wife.....

Are you happy sleeping with someone else's husband?    

She still doesn't get it

"Thanks to you and Phap my son has become a bastard" (and she even sends a picture) 

She manages to completely ruin my good and relaxed mood...... I feel sorry for Phap..... there are people who manage to suck the positive energy out of you in a single email.  And because I do LOVE him, her emails will just have the effect opposite of what she intends to achieve .......

19:45

I feel talking better after talking to the Monkey...... and he had to vent about the 10 hours texting every day for the last 10 days with Thailing.....and now she wants him to write an essay .....

CRAZY women.....

some stupid message exchanges with Bobby and some nice ones with Joanna ...

21:00

try to sleep

21:30

Messages from Phap

He is NOT coming tomorrow.....bla bla bla

I try video calling him 4 times.... no answer

I send him a message:

"I am number 4 now? That is not enough! Your wife sent me emails. She is mean. But you are not brave enough. I wish you a most happy marriage."

22:00

Good thing the Monkey answers the phone..... someone who understands me.....

0:00

I had to drink myself to sleep to be able to pass out !

6:30

waking up HUNG OVER

my first thought.. "oh, the fucking bastard"

6:45

I call Eda....she tries to be supportive....but she doesn't understand....and she has to run off to a concert.

7:15

MISERABLE....

trying to sleep

8:25

The phone rings.....he is in Tuy Hoa......OMFG, he spent the night in a bus...... we will meet in Tuy Hoa in 2 weeks....as usual, I overreacted.....but now my life feels OK again.....

9:15

Another email from The wife..... She still thinks Phap is with me in SaiGon..... 

He also knows how terrible it is to bring tears to others to pity him

The Phap who accepted to abandon his children to come to him must be very happy now 😎

Being the nice guy that I am....I reply to her......

He is not with me. He is in Tuy Hoa. Please don't contact me anymore.

9:45

what next?

The BITCH replies

"One for love, the other for money, in the end, you two bastards hurt two innocent people

He's the same age as my dad so I used to respect him. I didn't even bother to say it but you guys are getting more and more outrageous"

I DO write back:  'em gái là bất lịch sự

she still replies......"with someone like you, who sleeps with other people's husbands, I don't have to be polite".

That settles it..... no wonder he always leaves her....she is white (yellow?) TRASH..... I don't bother to reply...... but she's not in my Spam folder yet.... I want to keep those messages for another day

10:00

I talk to Chantal...... a second opinion often helps..... and Nu Nguyen is now in my Spam folder......there simply is no point....she is too young and ignant and NASTY to understand.

11:00

Bun Cha 145.   The owner is still not there.... the Bun Cha is the same....but now it lacks in comparison to the newly discovered and especially compared to the one in Tuy Hoa....  Plus it is expensive 95k for Bun cha with Rem Cua....compared to 30k in Tuy Hoa !

nap

14:00

groggy

15:30

The Monkey called back.... we chat for a while.....

17:30

Sushi..... at Sushi Haru..... not bad but never again....

veg out

22:00

missing Phap horribly......I'll try to pass out....

...... Tuy Hoa ..... Phap DRAMA & love .....Sala luxury

 0:05 ....Awake.... just after midnight ....

it's ugly outside.....and it looks like there is a lake in front of my house ....

An email..... my 6:50 am flight on Saturday the 22nd was changed to 16:50 ....that will not do.....

0:30

I've called GotoGate (of course they have to be in Canada) and requested a cancellation and refund for that changed flight...

4:00

A knock on the door ...... 9 1/2 is back

No kissing this time...even though I brushed my teeth

he comes huge loads !

I doze off while he watches the same routine: music, soccer, kickboxing, bonsai ....

5:00

He's off, asking for money for breakfast, 90 is not enough apparently, I give him 500 (that's only CAD25) and say "ve di, qua dat tien "......but then he has to justify his homo experiences as earning income....

Whatever... I need to get some more sleep before today's trip to Tuy Hoa

nap

6:20

smile on my face ;-)

high tide means dirty beach

7:15

Talk to Eda for a long time..... her life is so much more complicated than mine....

8:00

Talk to Andrea for a long time...

deer in her garden

.. she agrees..... as we get older, priorities have to change ..... she even approves of the fisherman ;-)

9:00

What now ? .....

putter putter putter

nap again

10:45

It is still UGLY outside.....

I try to call My .... but no answer

11:00

My calls back.....  I'll take the taxi at 14:00.... no point in torturing myself by riding through the rain for 2 hours on a scooter....

12:00

I've booked my ticket to Phnom Penh with IwoFly..... seems to work.....

12:30

No wine at the Blue Umbrella Store....but I buy 500k in phone minutes.....

12:45

Candy drops by for cheese and ham ;-)

12:50

A Zalo message from Thanh VH... "Helo"..... 

I make a drinking date with him for October 25.

hihihi.....I'm going to have a Harem ;-)

13:45

Time to get my act together and get going !

15:45

Tuy Hoa: Poor My had to drive for almost 2 hours to get us here because the road is so bad......he refuses extra pay.... but he gets a free lunch..... unfortunately the Bun Cha place was closed again.....so it has to be Pizza Bob....

16:15

I'm set up in my room while I'm typing this.....

16:45

I want to go to the store.....but I am SO TIRED..... even though I slept in the car......

nap

18:15

more Phap messages.....he will be here tomorrow afternoon....

18:30

Store.....grapes, spoons, yogurt.....

Watch Sissi on Netflix

20:30

SO TIRED .....

but I keep drinking and watching Sissi ;-)

22:00

Time to hit the bed....

5:00

still TIRED..and it's cold in the room....and I have to wait maybe all day ?.... dark thoughts are coming back .....

6:00

The new Viet visa is still processing.....slow this time....

6:30

I better have another nap before I get too drunk .... my phone bings...... pictures of the mail from Eda....I forgot about her.....

doze

8:00

I finally feel well rested....

5 year GIC rates are at 4.70% .....holy shit....

Shave, shower.....and I'm starting to get ANGRY again 

9:50

I call Eda......WHY should I NOT dump him?

She's trying to talk me down.....

10:00

A Zalo message to Phap...... Afternoon is WHAT TIME?

Bun Cha  ;-)

12:15

I call Eda again.....because I am FURIOUS......

13:15

The only reason he doesn't get a nasty mail is because he hasn't used Zalo since yesterday..... probably left his phone in Sai Gon......

nap

14:30

I walk to the beach......

I DO send another message:  Phap sap tat Han (Phap is about to lose Han) ....and yes, I am a Drama Queen

15:00

I'm sweating from the sun

15:45

And I go crazy.....I book the panorama suite at Sala for 2 nights..... I'm going to leave here..... let Phap be freaked for a change.....

16:00

Drunk and checking out and moving to Sala Grand .....

the Welcome Tea

the view from the balcony of the corner suite

I haven't even unpacked my laptop yet.....when the phone rings.... it's a WORRIED looking Phap in front of the Hong Hai wood paneling..... "WHERE ARE YOU NOW?"

One look at that puppy face and I tell him where I am.... he walks over (15 mins)....and everything is fine again....

Room service brings a complimentary bottle of wine? 

 really?

we talk on the balcony....he says "I sorry"....I'm just HAPPY to see him.... his parents didn't give him a motorbike....it took him an hour to take the bus from his village to here.....barely 25km away....

18:30

Pizza Bob with Phap..... I'm sad I didn't bring my phone... the fountains are executing the most beautifully choreographed dances while there is classical music playing .....and the people are enjoying their city..... what a contrast to Canada ...

6:00  techtelmechtel.....as usual he doesn't get off .... morning is not his time

7:45

OMG, I slept a lot... and OMG, does he look SEXY sleeping 

emails from EDA.....OMFG she cleaned Grandma's bathroom and the bedroom and organized the rooms ....

WHAT TF is it with people who want TWO sinks.....can't brush your teeth over ONE sink ???

10:00

We sit on the balcony looking at the ocean, when the maid sticks her head onto the balcony ... I exclaim "khong don dep !"... and she leaves

I figure out how to turn on the red light outside the front door.....it's a switch above the thermostat....I set the light to do not disturb....

10:00

Bun Cha with Phap

holding hands, nuzzling, pecking..... with another session (he likes that one ;-) (and while we cuddle in post-climactic bliss, the phone rings...it's the maid again wanting to clean the room)...

But after a while it gets boring.... he doesn't want to do anything.... he's happy just holding hands and watching TV..... maybe I'm too high-strung for that ?

15:00

He leaves....not without asking for 5 trieu to pay off some remaining debt.... disappointment....  but hey... that's what I paid for my luxury room

15:30

A taxi trip to Coop.mart..... Maybe the driver REALLY doesn't know where coop.mart is but when I get out my cell phone, keep looking left, and say "Nguoi Tay biet coop.mart o dau" he quickly says Xin Loi and starts driving in the right direction.... and at coop.mart he charges less than the meter says and waits for free.....they do that here....because they wait all day ... it doesn't occur to them that they could charge for that....

16:30

I can't decide on my room in Phnom Penh.... Ohana for US$ 117 or Luxury for $236 ?  My world has shifted.....those $236 are for 3 nights..... In Vancouver I wouldn't get a room for one night for that money.

I finally have time to take pictures.....

17:00

OK....I'm taking the Penthouse .... (in retrospect: St00pid ;-)

18:30

Vietjet online check in says "this reservation code does not exist or has not been paid yet"..... OH FUCK....I find the confirmation email that I paid .....

18:45

I head down to the lobby....  Despite the advertising on the room key card, there is NO shuttle bus to the airport..... IDIOTS....

19:10

I head out for walk, with my phone, in the hope of catching the fountain magic I witnessed yesterday.... but it's not happening tonight..

.. maybe because it is a school night ?

21:30    I can't sleep .... too many things happening..... OMFG.... I am truly LIVING my life ....

Dire Days.....May 22..... Chantal visits....tables gone ... exhausted but still happy

A no-school night in Vancouver:

2:00

Eda went to bed..... I still can't believe she came here even though her period is troubling her so much.... I am so grateful to have such a good friend...... she is keeping me SANE ....

2:30

I'm still SO WIRED because of the Phap video call and the great time with Eda...this is what LIFE is about.....but it's time to sleep !

7:45

OMG.....now this is a REAL HANGOVER.....

coffee doesn't help.....wine doesn't help......OUCH.....

8:15

Eda is awake..... 

10:30

back home from the bottle depot....I panicked when I realized that I forgot my mask and 2 homeless guys were scanning the incoming electro trash....

Oh....when I flicked all the fuses last night, I also killed the pilot lights of the two fireplaces..... something else to fix :-(

10:45

I go out to check the solar wattage being produced.....ZERO..... back inside....oh...I missed to pop one of the fuses back in.... the one for the outside outlet..... now it works....22.8W....

11:00

I email Chantal......

pressure relief...MUCH needed !

11:15

Chantal replied.... she'll be here in about 1 hour.....

11:45

of course, now is when I feel like a nap :-(

Instead I go to work in the front yard.....

12:15

Chantal has arrived ....

we chat, we eat, then she wants to disrupt my rest day by using Facebook Marketplace to get rid of the ugly gold & glass coffee tables....

Finally, I agree, clean the tables and Chantal takes pictures....

Some man with an Arab or Persian name replies and wants to take them both.... he says it will take 45 minutes.....

40 minutes later....Chantal missed a phone call... we go check...and a woman (wearing a hijab) and an Arab looking man are loading the tables into a minivan...... I thank them for taking the tables...they are very polite and respectful....and I have a vision:

A room with carpets on the walls...those golden tables in the middle with a teapot and lots of small glasses on top....and people sitting on pillows around the table drinking tea .....

These tables have finally found their true home ;-)

Then Chantal wants to head back to the big creek..... first we try to snap the padlock.... only to discover it wasn't even locked..... and it's gorgeous down there by the creek..... I'm grateful to Chantal to have pushed me to go there.....

16:45

Chantal leaves....taking the lard pots and the succulent plant and the Cuisinart coffee maker with her.....

17:15

I email Carlos ... and he replies promptly.... I KNEW that Carlos is one of the most sincere and least phony people I know !

17:45

I feel I NEED a nap....

nap

18;45

I'm killing the hunger feeling with toast, turkey breast, pickles, Kampot pepper... not too bad... should finish that turkey breast soon...

19:20

After a lot of FRUSTRATING button pushing, I've finally managed to turn the pilot light in the downstairs fireplace on again.....the controls are NOT intuitive !!!!

19:45

I carry the orange-flowering tree to the front...... I envision it growing next to the stairs in the front.....much prettier than it growing behind the creek in the back..... I've dug the hole already.... it will be planted just before it starts raining .....

20:00

I start stripping Grandma's bed.....sheets into garbage bags and the down pillows will follow when I have room in the garbage can.....

20:15

a bit of calisthenics....more organizing/cleaning/trashing stuff

An idea....Why put goose-down duvets in the trash....might as well bury the feathers in the garden !

21:00

I email Phap..... "I am still heart-happy because I saw you"

21:15

I'm tired....No Netflix for 2 days.....this is The Life ;-)

21:45

Can't sleep....eat some vanilla yogurt with mandarins..... MISSING Phap....just hoping he didn't meet anyone to fall in love with.....

22:30

checking out male Asian escorts on LeoList....yeah....I know..... but when Chantal asked me whether I thought I felt that I had to be monogamous, I instantly reply: ....Hell NO....I'm not the one who lied, cheated, made a baby, and fucking got MARRIED !  

23:30

try to read (Erich Maria Remarque) and sleep

but NO....I'm moving furniture

....because I'm encouraged by Chantal's action today....the TV stands and crap will go for free and I will have the TV with porn in front of my bed (blush ;-)

Dire Days: May 5 -6 ....Corona Tsunami .....FRUSTRATION.... Bedroom move .... No Eda?!? ....SADNESS

5:45 in Vancouver....

I got my $484 tax refund ;-)

7:15

tipsy and tired....

7:45

can't sleep

an email to Phap  "sleep well my love"

I also reply to Avocado Alex.....

8:30

Sangak with cheese/capers and the other half with a slice of salami.....I'm going to get fat....

The weather forecast for the next 2 weeks......2 weeks of RAIN.....  SIGH :-(

nap

10:00

I stagger into the kitchen...check the Viet phone....nothing....2 seconds later the Canadian phone chimes....a Phap reply...."You too. Have a nice day love. I want to see Han always smiling"...

I MISS him SO MUCH...  he's only 29....and he is such an amazing person.....she doesn't deserve him....

More weeding out junk....it hurts... but it has to go.....George's cell phone goes into the electronics recycling....almost exactly 8 years after he died.....

screw showering for the day

A trip down Westview: A carton of cigs and Sushi/caviar and a snapper fillet.....to be fried and eaten with curry and rice.....

11:15

Back home....eat some sushi.....and I change the lockscreen on my Canadian phone.... 

but then I change it back again.....looking at him every time I use my phone would break my heart while I'm away from him.....

11:30

When I cut the snapper fillet into 3 pieces to be frozen separately, I get the urge...... cast iron pan, olive oil, Kampot pepper, salt, lime, a touch of wasabi.....on Multigrain toast......it's divine....I really know how to cook !

Next time I'll add a hint of garlic and a hint of chili...

12:00

Interest rates are still going up.....the 2-year GIC that I bought now pays 3.61% instead of 3.53% 5 days ago

12:30

I use a thick wooden stick to convert the two UGLY but heavy carriage light stands into a BARBELL.... Amazingly, the wooden stick fits perfectly...and the combined weight of those metal stands is perfect as a barbell.....Happy calisthenics ;-)

13:00

Eda emails....."looks like you're going to miss me this weekend".....oh no...not another one..... 

OMG....the Covid wave is coming....Conrad.....Mika...Chantal....Randy ....maybe Eda next....

and it's POURING outside and it's 5 Celsius at 1pm.....what a hell hole !!!

WHY THE FUCK am I HERE and NOT in Viet Nam?

14:15

The Inglewood psychiatrist calls..... I thank him for turning Grandma into a human being.... he is GOOD....

I use that black insulating sticky tape to insulate the front door and the upstairs fireplace.....that should put and end to or at least reduce that annoying cold draft in the living room.....and should reduce my heating bill.....

15:00

Another one of those phone calls....."you have an Amazon order of $1500....it may be fraudulent"....this time I talk to the guy on the other end.....and I ask him "How much are they paying you to annoy people and to rip people off?"

15:15

I liberated the 3rd charge controller from the van ...

15:30

read more....

Throw more junk in the garbage bin....about 100 cassette tapes in racks....

I talk to Andrea for over one hour....

17:30

Still no Amazon delivery....

read a bit....

18:15

still no Amazon....

18:30

Talk to Chantal....I can right away tell by her voice that she is SICK..... sore throat, fever, chills, etc etc

Talk to Eda....she's still fine.....

19:00

My Amazon order to be delivered by Purolator is officially designated LATE on the website.....what else is new?   Go Canada Go !

nap

21:00

NOW they are saying sorry..... the package is not coming today after all .... FUCK Purolator

I start cooking rice....down to 2 in the freezer....might as well cook now while I'm awake and have nothing else urgent to do....

22:00

I didn't send a "have a good day" email to Phap.....I feel bad....but I have to tone it down.... otherwise I miss him too much......tomorrow morning maybe.....

22:45

OMG....I find pictures from 25 years ago and some even older.....

0:30

awake and hungry.....sangak with cherry jam / hummus.... Must NOT buy the Safeway generic hummus again....NOT good....

1:30

time to get more zzzs

5:45

coffee.... I can feel the result of my calisthenics in my arms and shoulders !

6:15

A lovey email to Phap....

7:00

read and pressure relief....

nap

8:30

I wake up and remember the last few words uttered by me in my dream "It's a betrayal"

8:45

I've put the hand painted 4387 sign in the Van's rear window.....Yes, it looks trashy, but at least the delivery people will be able to see a number now.

Sangak with salami & capers.... not ideal but I was hungry and I can feel muscle ache !

9:15

I've wet-mopped the linoleum part of the floor of the prospective new bedroom, Eda's bathroom, as well as mine upstairs....... productive !

10:00

I've shaved !    I'm a bit down because I haven't heard from Phap (Friday evening over there) but I can't let it make me dysfunctional .... I have got stuff to do ....not only to see him again, but to steer my life in the direction it should be going..... 

11:00

Back in the house....and CRANKY.......absolute traffic gridlock on Westview below the highway.....God only knows why....people did U-ys to get out of it and so did I .....Safeway.....cranky people and NO Covid test kits.... I can't help it and ask the pharmacist "Does ANYTHING work in this country?"

Also at Safeway: Tons of veggie burgers, but all the beef burgers are trash and come with mashed potato and veggies.....FUCK

AND ....nothing from Phap.....doubts are rising again ...... 

11:15

I'm putting the $3.49 Stoufer's meatloaf in the microwave......

Actually not as bad as I had feared...A LOT of Kampot pepper gives it some taste....at least I got some red meat into my body !

11:45

I check on Google Maps....Westview below the highway is still in gridlock...... What a FUCKED-UP city !

12:00

I've had to interrupt mowing the front meadow because my digestive system decided to transport the 'meatloaf' to the waste-end ASAP..... 

At least the front meadow is done for a while...and I cleared some of that wild growth with the lawnmower ;-)

13:15

I've moved all the furniture and my new bedroom is complete...

....including remote-controlled reading light ;-)

I read and sleep very well in my new bedroom...until at 13:45 the doorbell wakes me.....Purolator delivered !

I put 2 dandelion solar lights in the back yard.... and another 2....

14:30

The traffic jam on lower Westview has cleared.....might as well dump all the stuff in the car at the Salvation Army now!

And I drop off the Sony laptop at the repair shop... not sure it'll be worth fixing it...but it'll be a good spare...

15:00

Back at home.....

read a bit.....toast with salami mandarins & cheese....

16:00

Nothing from Phap..6:00 in Vietnam....the thoughts are getting darker....

I try disconnecting the stupid yard flood lights that Albert installed..... no motion sensor, only a daylight sensor....and no OFF button.....I turn the rear one towards the wall and leave the front one for now.....I want to disconnect them, but don't want to be electrocuted in my inebriated state....

16:45

Eda calls....she has no Covid tests...her co-worker offered twice to bring her some but didn't follow through....what is WRONG with people in this country?!?....so she can't test herself tomorrow morning and won't come....

17:00

7am in Vietnam....nothing..... the last email from him was yesterday at 10:00 my time

Precooked noodles with chorizo, capers, and olives...YUM

18:00

nap

19:30

20:00

The rear light is facing the wall and now the twilight sensor makes it flash.....go down and turn it sideways....that seems to fix the flashing.....

18:15

I start laundry, refill all the empty boxes with books and reload the car....

21:00

It's dark enough now.....the solar lights go on.... not exactly what I was hoping for....not exactly in good taste....the colours are a bit too gaudy ....

I try to read and sleep....but NO..... I'm hungry !

22:30

half a ciabatta bun with salami, cheese/caviar, hummus (in three different sections)

23:00

try to sleep again.....

Apr 14 ...15.. ABSOLUTE BLISS .....and sadness......this way MADNESS lies ....and Romeo & Juliet times

 4:45

I'm awake....my face is puffy.....GREAT, just what I needed.....

another doze.....and too much booze

7:30

I've done my calisthenics and completed the ArriveCan application.....

8:00

No Phap...... still no idea whether he will show up....and even if he does, maybe he'll just bring more bad news.....

shower..... I feel better..

8:30 ...but I keep drinking...because that bad feeling just won't go away.....

I send an email "Where is my only love?"

8;35

And email: Phap is on the way.....

OMFG....happy

8:45

Another bowel movement.....and I realize that I've soiled my undies WTF?....

nap

10:00

He should be here by now.....but he isn't....which was truth and which was a lie?......the man is driving me insane....

10:30

He REALLY should be here by now..... I'm preparing an email...... "My future will be happy because I am a courageous person.  But you will bring unhappiness to yourself and to everyone around you.  GOOD BYE."

10:45

I Zalo him "????"

No answer

I call him.....he says Benh Thanh..... I still don't believe him

11:00 

When I bring out the garbage, he rolls up.......

What follows are the happiest 6 hours of my life....and he ain't unhappy either ;-)...... and I think I've finally managed to instill some hope into him

17:00

He leaves....

17:30

I call Tam in Phu Diem ....talk to her husband

I call Karl in Karlsruhe.... voicemail....

18:15

At the Parkhaus again.....I ordered a Zigeunerschnitzel.

I email Phap.....Thank you for making me the happiest person on the planet today....I hope you didn't get wet....

18:20

Tam called back....I call her and she answers.....she ask me "Do I have a wife?" ...Not spilling the beans, I say "I don't have a wife, but my lover has a wife"..."but he does not like his wife"....  she asks 'Are you in VH or in Saigon"...I say "I'm in Saigon and you know WHY I am in Saigon"...... I don't mention any names....but she's a good person and I had to get it off my chest....maybe I should just keep my mouth shut......

19:05

back in my room....still digestive issues.....but I make it to the toilet in time

20:00

I so miss his head in my lap...my head on his shoulder.....his snoring....the intimacy.......

20:45

nap

1:30

a sip of wine.....

sleeep

7:00 I call EDA....I miss her so much....

doze

8:00

Time to get stuff done....

Another quick test..

...NEGATIVE......

I check in online for tomorrow's ANA flight.... but I still have to get the boarding pass at the airport.....

I call Wemper Woman...... I simply have to tell someone how HAPPY and how SAD I am......

8:30

buy a tuna sandwich, some banana bread, more wine and another carton of cigarettes.... I might have to smuggle....

doze

10:00

Joanna/Seattle calls back..... she as a literary person understands the "heart of gold" and "Romeo & Juliet" references..... The Old and the Restless....

11:30

OMG....life is SO EASY in SaiGon..... Nicky...today with his hair sticking up like a bird...called me a Grab motorcycle..... I got my PCR test done.....took a taxi back......

12:00

my eyes are wet again......because I miss him so much....my heart overfloweth....and I'm afraid for him....I hope he learns quickly.....

nap

13:45

lost hours

horny, drunk, tired, tipsy

15:45

I should go eat something proper......

15:50

Nicky with his bird hair.... The Turkish guy with his baby.... the laundry woman with her baby.... people smile and wave at me on the 100 meter walk to the Bookworm's Restaurant.... I am HOME here....that's why tears keep welling up in my eyes when I think about tomorrow's departure.....

16:00

what is that touch on my leg?.....the restaurant dog came over to nuzzle for its pets... ;-)

In the news.....today I get a PCR test without even having to register....walk in and about 4 minutes wait time.....in the third world.... I read the news.... and PCR tests are still not properly available in Canada 

WHAT the FUCK !?!

16:05

Phap wrote.....Today how is Han....?

 typical....but I don't hold back

Today, Han is sad because he has to leave his lover's country....and misses Phap very much.

But Han is also happy knowing that Han will come back and we will be happy again

I love you very much

Be brave and don't be afraid 

But before I can send it, one drop of lemon juice fucks up my touchpad...... Good thing I brought the wireless mouse..... ! But I have to get back to the room first for that.....

then my internet dies..... ...no ...it's probably just another one of those Windows updates..... and my touchpad comes back to life....

nap

18:30

NO REPLY....and my spirits DROP.....

I email him....."I want to see your face before I leave....videocall or send me a picture of you?"

19:10

I call the testing centre..... "I did the PCR test this morning and was told I would have the results at 19:00.... I do not have them.....they say they are just finishing and will send it in a few minutes...."

I truly LOVE this country....but I also hate its deficiencies.... maybe I still have to work on erasing the German inside myself....

19:20

I videocall Him....He doesn't answer........

19:25

I email him

"I am sorry that I making your life complicated 

19:30

I'm getting old.... don't have time for Bullshit anymore !

19:45

I video call Iwona....she's at the hairdresser.... she'll call me back

19:55

I've deleted ALL of Phap's emails....and all his pictures....FUCK THIS SHIT !

20;00

I am SO CLOSE sending another DMM email......

20:05

He video calls me.....

I am happy again..

20:15

an email from him: "Dung buon"..... .....I'm not sure that's enough.....

20:30

try to have a short nap.....pack later

doze.....

the alarm is set for 3:00

good enough....

22:00

an email...... "I miss you"

I reply "I miss you too... it is like a constant belly ache....do not be afraid.... Karma will help..."